you could make me happy this way

i feel so down recently. why cant i be in singapore with the rest???? :'( this yr felt waaay more worst than the last. I feel lonely most of the time even though i got people around me. its like there's smth HUGE missing in my life. or mayb its just me; setting up this humongous invisible wall around myself. i feel so reclusive nowadays even though i am still smiling and laughing, my soul's nt exactly there. if u noe wad i mean.. i dunno y but recently i reali dread gg to sch, dread waking up to a new day....

i dunno wad words to use to express myself now bt.. i reali feel so nostalgic, so cheerless to the point of feeling sick. or mayb i am sick. i skipped 2 lectures tt day cuz my tooth was giving me problems. no surprise there. and i felt sooo bad for skipping those lectures.

here i am, struggling to keep up with Chemical Principles and i still skipped a lecture just cuz of my stupid f*king tooth. and i gt an assignment due this wed plus 2 reading logs this fri. AND i haven exactly start studying for that assignment. wth. and i hate it when...

argh! forget it.

ok bye. i am nt exactly in the mood to blog though i have heaps of things i nid to tell someone. i figured tt such thoughts is best not publicized.

anw, THANKS TO ANNY N LAI for ur early bdae presents; mossimo tote and jayjay shirt. they noticed tt i was nt really myself these few days n so got me my bdae presents in advance to lift my moods. i noe anny will be reading this, so.. THANKS ALOT FOR THE PRESENTS and ATTEMPT TO CHEEER ME UP! i really love u guys. i will try to be happier. and i feel really bad for showing my moody self and dampen everyone elses' moods as well. and we were supposed to go for a movie last night bt i wasnt exactly feeling movie. so we decided to go on tues instead. I NID TO CHEER UP bt i cant. and y cant i even put on a facade!! SHIIIT i effing hate myself for spoiling everyone's day.

and shit. smth happened again. we cant meet chao. ARGHH. wad in the world is wrong with my life nw.

{ 3/09/2008 }